


how the fuck did we get here from a cereal debate

by meowchela



Category: Deltarune (Video Game)
Genre: Break Up Talk, Cereal, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, aite chief ill be honest, but like satirical, even if its shit, gang gang and all that, i dont know how good this is but im here to feed the suitless trio nation, i wrote this weeks ago and forgot to post it bc of work, jevil just takes a joke too far, nothing too bad happens cmon yall know me by now, yall are starving me included im here to help w that, yeah - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:35:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27617738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/meowchela/pseuds/meowchela
Summary: Seam breaks up a heated debate between Jevil and Roxuls. After some overdramatics, they cuddle.
Relationships: Jevil/Rouxls Kaard/Seam, Suitless Trio
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	how the fuck did we get here from a cereal debate

**Author's Note:**

> i'd just like to state: i dont side with anyone in this debate i dont give a fuck how you eat your cereal
> 
> actually no. i side with lancer who just straight up osmoses food into his skin. his father doesnt do that btw its a lancer only power

"Thoust CANNOTE be serious," Roxuls said, voice dripping with much more contempt than was needed of the situation.  
"WHAT, WHAT?" said Jevil, lounging midair. "ALL I SAID WAS I HEATED UP MY CEREAL."  
"Why wouldst thou HEAT UP CEREAL???" Roxuls said. " 'Tis a meal MADE to be consumed room temperatureth or colde! One does not simply HEAT IT."   
Jevil rolled his eyes, pupils crossing all four slits. A grin tugged at his lips, though. "OH COME ON, DUKE. YOU'RE NOT SERIOUSLY GETTING HEATED OVER A BREAKFAST FOOD?"  
"I'll stoppeth getting heatedeth whenst the cereal alsoe stops gettinge heated."  
Jevil leaned in close to Roxuls. Their noses would be touching if they had them. "YOU'RE NO FUN, FUN."  
"Thou had a different opinione last night."  
That caused him to giggle. Roxulsjust huffed and crossed his arms. "Regardless, name ONE REASON heated cerealeth is better than normal cereal."  
Jevil shrugged. "DUNNO. IT JUST TASTES BETTER."  
"HOWETH IN THE WORLDE DOTH IT-" Roxuls took a breath, calming himself from his outburst, and composed himself. "Okay, okay, look. Just becauseth thou thinke somethinge is good doesnt meaneth it actually is."  
"EXPLAINS MY ATTRACTION TO YOU, THEN~" Jevil winked. "BUT ALSO, HEATED CEREAL IS GOOD NO MATTER WHAT PRISSY-PANTSED DUKES SAY."  
"Mine pants art NOT PRISSY-"  
"Darlings?" The door creaked open, and Seam walked in holding a cup of tea. "Is everything alright?"  
Roxuls' glare didn't leave Jevil's, their eyes locked in silent battle. "This little insecte hath put forth the perposterous notion that heated cerealeth tastes any shred decente."  
Jevil narrowed his eyes. "I DON'T GET WHY YOU'RE SO JUDGEMENTAL ABOUT THIS, THIS! IT'S JUST CEREAL THATS HEATED UP!"  
"Cereal, hmm..?" Seam hummed and took a long sip from his mug. He smacked his lips as they parted from the cup, then spoke. "I'm afraid I can't help either of you here. I never liked the stuff to begin with."  
Roxuls and Jevil's eyes both widened, and slowly their gazes shifted to Seam. He took a sip, swirled his mug, and looked to them with a puzzled expression. "....what?"  
"SEAM." Jevil floated over and gripped his shoulders. "OF...OF ALL OUR YEARS TOGETHER, AS COMPANIONS, AS PERFORMANCE PARTNERS, AS ROMANTIC PARTNERS............AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME. I.....I NEVER KNEW. YOU'VE KEPT THIS SECRET FROM ME, FROM EVERYONE, FOR SO LONG, PERFECTLY SHELTERED AND LOCKED IN A MYSTERIOUS LITTLE BOX ALL YOUR LIFE.............AND ONLY NOW.....DO I LEARN THE AWFUL, HORRIBLE TRUTH..........I.....ITS ALMOST SICKENING, SEAM...."  
"...J-Jevil...?"  
"THE FACT THAT YOU DONT FUCKING LIKE CEREAL?!!?!?"  
Seam sighed in a mixture of relief and exasperation. "Goodness, I never thought it was this big of a deal, but..."  
Roxuls held his arm over his head. "Jevil, I feelest fainte. Cometh assiste me before I falleth over."  
Jevilimmediately rushed to Roxuls' side and held him up. Seam groaned again.  
"Come now, you two, I just don't see the appeal of it. It isn't that big a deal."  
Jevil and Roxuls looked at each other.  
"Art thou thinkinge what I'm thinking?"  
"POSSIBLY, POSSIBLY." Jevil turned towards Seam again, but kept his eyes on the floor. ".....Seam."  
Seam's ears lowered at the jester's sudden serious tone. Jevil continued on, keeping his eyes glued to the floor. "This is....this is just too much, Seam. Even after all our years together, I..I don't think I can stand for this. We....Roxuls and I just might have to break up with you."   
".......Over cereal."  
Roxuls looked at Seam and saw the pain growing on his face. Quickly, he straightened his posture and loudly cleared his throat, knowing Jevil had made the bit too convincing.  
"Welleth. W-we couldst offer an alternative to thou...! If, um, thou doesntst wante us to leave."  
Jevil looked at him, then at Seam, and nodded eagerly, also realizing he'd gone too far. "O-OH! YES, YES. WE DON'T HAVE TO LEAVE IMMEDIATELY! BUT YOU HAVE TO PROVE YOURSELF WORTHY FIRST."   
"And how would I do that....?"  
"BEATING US IN A DUEL!" "Bestinge us with thoust wit over a puzzle!"   
Seam just shook his head. He walked over and kissed each of them on the forehead.  
"..! WELL!" Jevil said, blushing. "I THINK THAT'S PROOF ENOUGH, DON'T YOU THINK?"  
"The worthiest of all," Roxuls said with a sigh. He walked over to Seam and kissed him fully, then pulled him in for an embrace. "Thoust can stay despite thou're less tna exemplary opinions on breakfast foods."  
Seam returned the embrace, and caught Jevil when he flew into him to include him as well. "Good to know it just takes some kisses to keep you two rascals under control."  
"CONTROL?" Jevil laughed. "YOU CAN'T CONTROL ME, I CAN DO ANYTHI-" He was cut off by Seam's lips meeting his, and he melted into it almost immediately, hugging Seam's neck.  
Seam pulled away with a grin and Jevil buried his face in his shoulder. Roxuls just chuckled at the display.  
Seam sat down, guiding his boyfriends with him. Jevil sat leaned against him, and Roxuls shifted to lay his head in his lap. Seam put a hand on his cheek, and they were all at peace.  
Until Roxls piped up again. "Justbecauseth we had a temporaryeth truce over Seam's awful taste doesn't meaneth i'm donest with thou, worm. Cereal isn't meant to be heated."  
"WHATEVER FLOATS YOUR BOAT, I GUESS. HEATED CEREAL ISN'T AS GOOD AS FERMENTED BANANNAS ANYWAY."  
"Thous likest WHAT NOW-"


End file.
